Archive for May, 2010
Tuesday, May 18th, 2010
I have two lists for you. The first one is a list of the Top 10 Most Dangerous Foods to Consume While Driving for us North American commuters:
2. hot soup
7. fried chicken
8. jelly or cream-filled doughnuts
9. Soft drinks (Did you know that carbonation in the nose is perilous while driving?)
Now let’s compare that list to the results of a BRITISH study. According to the Brits, the Top 10 Most Dangerous Foods While Driving are:
1. potato chips
2. chocolate bars
3. bottled drinks
4. canned drinks
5. tea or coffee
6. sandwiches or wraps
8. french fries
Potatos chips = most dangerous? I don’t exactly know how our British brothers and sisters eat their chips but obviously they’re doing it completely wrong.
Looking at both lists I also realize that I’m a safe driver. I eat jerky and wash it down with a carton of chocolate milk while I drive so I’m in the clear!
To confess your near death experiences while eating and driving, click the headline above. Bon Appetite.
Monday, May 17th, 2010
According to a nationwide survey, the most-used excuse for being late to work is ‘traffic’, cited by 24% of tardy employees. BORRRRING-AH! Let’s make a list of some more creative excuses for being late for work. I’ll start it and you can add your own by clicking the headline above:
• “Got a hernia pulling on my socks.”
• “It’s been so warm the molecules on the road expanded thereby increasing the distance between my home and work.”
• “Couldn’t find my artificial limb.”
• The unique and rarely used, “I hate this job and don’t really give a damn about being on time.”
• “I tried to get away earlier but your wife said she had energy for one more.”
And the most logical response of them all: • “I was early yesterday.”
Thursday, May 13th, 2010
New stats reveal that 1 out of 3 high school students don’t know all the lyrics to our own national anthem. How is that possible? I’m guessing they don’t make kids sing it before class every morning like they did back in my grade school days. Hell, just by watching sporting events I even know all the words of the hybrid version that features both English and French lyrics. What’s worse and far more astounding is that 40% of the kids surveyed didn’t know the MELODY of the our anthem. Yet they can sing any Black Eyed Peas song without a glitch, I bet. Kids… learn the anthem. Adults… make sure you know the anthem so that you can teach it to your kids. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT mimic this man’s melody: worst version of O Canada ever! HILARIOUS.
Tuesday, May 11th, 2010
Via Vince & Rosie’s Tough Trivia (hear it M-F at 6:35am) we learned it takes us 7 minutes to fall asleep, on average. Some nights it’s doesn’t take that long while other nights it takes 10 times longer.
For those who struggle to fall asleep, there are a variety of reasons such as stress, caffeine intake, or possbily the Dutch Oven. What’s that? You’re not aware? Well, that’s where your partner pollutes the air quality underneath your blankets and it seeps out disrupting your ability to comfortably drift off to Neverland. But now there’s a solution:
The Better Marriage Blanket. It’s a new product designed to deal with the accidental Dutch Oven. The blanket contains the same type of fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons. Check it out: https://buybettermarriageblanket.com/
Friday, May 7th, 2010
Sure, you know me as Troy “Vince” Vincent. However, I was born Jamie Micheal Edwards. I was then immediately orphaned by Helen Edwards, my biological mother. I assume I was a crack baby. For months I laid on my back, fed canned carnation milk. Yes, I was parentally handicapped. I bring this up because Saturday is Birthmother’s Day in recognition of women who gave birth and, like Helen Edwards of St. John’s, Newfoundland on March 23rd, 1976, for some reason or another felt they had to abandon their newborn child. I don’t care how hideous I may have been, it was uncalled for. With that said, my adoptive parents gave me a great middleclass life in Alberta. I’m very thankful for that. So don’t think I’m bitter. I’m not (aside from being named ‘Jamie’). I began the process of locating my biological mother, hence how I know her name and mine at birth. The next step is contacting her. Do I want to do that? Yes. First off, I want to know if I have any full or even half brothers and/or sisters. Being an only child in my adoptive family, that’s the one thing I feel I missed out on. The other reason for wanting to meet my bio-mom is to find out if she’s rich. If so, cha-ching! “Yo mamma, you’re in arrears for three-and-a-half decades of birthdays and Christmases. Show me the $!” I’ll make sure there’s a cam-corder rollin’ to capture that magical reunion and post it here afterwards. Until then… my thoughts are reserved for my Adoptive/REAL Mother who passed away 8 years ago. Love ya, Ma! Happy Mother’s Day.
Thursday, May 6th, 2010
While I do enjoy celebrating Cinco de Mayo, let us never forget what happens previous to that – Star Wars day. May the 4th (may the force…) is a day for all losers fans to force share their unwitty pun upon the rest of the world. Though not as hardcore as most, I am a Star Wars dweeb fan. This year for May the 4th celebrations, a fellow nerf-herder fan sent me a link to a website dedicated to depicting Stormtroopers in various positions and situations. It’s not as provocative as it sounds. One pic for every day of the year. Hence the name www.stormtroopers365.com. Check it out, you rebel scum.
Wednesday, May 5th, 2010
Goosebumps, man. I love the music, the moment lived and then rewound, reminding us history is being made every night. And THIS ONE features Lethbridge boy Kris Versteeg! We’ll have another ‘Game of the Week’ at the Shark Club. Join us for prizes and ‘pass the puck’ every Canucks game vs. Versteeg and his ‘Hawks. Plus, win a 32″ flat panel Sony TV.
Tuesday, May 4th, 2010
Yes, an unbiased publication has crunched numbers and calculated that Lethbridge is THE BEST CITY TO LIVE IN… in Alberta. Overall, we’re #11 in Canada. That’s excellent. In Alberta… we’re the best. Edmonton ranked as 2nd best in the province, followed by Calgary and as for the rest of them (Red Deer, Ft. McMurray, et. al) I didn’t dig that deep into the list of 179 cities. Now, this topic on the show generated phone calls from people who pointed out what’s NOT great about Lethbridge. To those of you who live their life like this, stop it. Are you happy in your lives? Obviously not. The reason for that is you’re too focused on what you DON’T have that you don’t appreciate what you DO have. Lethbridge doesn’t have a Leisure Centre. Boohoo. I grew up without one and yet easily enjoyed an active youth. We don’t have a Red Lobster. Boohoo. We have a hundred other places to chow down at. Appreciate what you DO have here in Lethbridge. To help you do so, here’s just a couple of the MANY things I enjoy about our city. Afterall, Lethbridge has been my favorite city in the province every since I ventured here back in the 90s to attend the UofL. 1. The coulees. They might not seem much compared to those mountains on the western horizon but once you live in a town that resembles a helicoptor pad (Lloydminster), you appreciate coulee valleys carved out of prairie land. 2. The size of the city. What’s that? It took you 17 minutes to get to work? Poor you. In a big city, you can go 4 blocks in 17 minutes during rush hour. Just talk to your Calgary friends who commute an hour and a half everyday for work. That’s no living life to it’s fullest. 3. Location. We get mass amounts of sunshine in Southern Alberta, we’re close to the border for U.S. fun, a mere 1h45m from Calgary, an hour from the mountains, off the beaten path so that we’re a hidden gem safe from all the Hwy 1 voyageurs clogging our arteries, and so much more. 4. We’re not a boom-bust city. Our economy sustains itself through good and bad. I’ve lived in a boom-town where rent jax-up 400% (no exaggeration) and I have lived in that same bust-town when people over-spent and now grumble because they’re deep in debt and out of work. 5. The Wind. Call me crazy, but that wind plowing against my house at night is a lullaby. I love it. And when it’s +12 in January, who doesn’t love that Chinook? I know… there are some people who don’t. Here’s a map showing the city exits. Feel free to leave at your convenience and let the rest of us enjoy what is truly THE BEST CITY IN ALBERTA – Lethbridge!