Thanks to Club Q Rockstar Greg for today’s Last Laff…
 
Three neighborhood kids have been told by their parents never EVER to go near the old deserted house at the end of the street.  At night, strange creepy things happened…so everyone stayed away.
 
But one night they decide to find out for themselves the mystery of that old house, so they go to the end of the street and open the old hanging gate.   As they approach the disintegrating front porch, they stop!   There’s something coming from the house, but it’s so faint they can’t make out what it is.
 
One of the boys pushes open the front door…and they go into the dusty cob-webbed front hall.   They can now hear clearly the sound coming from upstairs!   “rap…rap…rap”.   Scared to death but wanting to find out what’s making the noise, they climb the creaky staircase and stand outside the door at the end of the hall.  Inside that room….the sound is MUCH louder.  “Rap…Rap…Rap”
 
Two of the boys turn to run, but the third says they came to find out the secret of the old house and that’s what they were going to do.  He pushes open the door….and in the middle of the room is a deathly black box.   From that box … is where the now deafening sound is coming from.   “RAP!   RAP!   RAP!”
 
The bravest boy approached the box…..and pushes open the lid.
 
3 pairs of eyes slowly peer inside the depths of the box…..and you know what they saw?!?
 
Wrapping paper….
 
As a Club Q Rock Star, you can rate the joke and earn points, plus just for voting you have one last chance to win a Large Tombstone Pizza from Topper’s Pizza!  Log on to your account to vote NOW.   Have a funny joke? (please!!!) E-mail them now:
 
mellaney.dahl@rci.rogers.com

chris.mcewin@rci.rogers.com

So, a friend sent this to me…and I’m not sure what is the saddest part.  That someone made this, that I watched it…or sadly the damn song is catchy beyond belief:
 

 
Well if you found yourself here, and worse yet, actually watched a part of that video it seems like you deserve something.
 

Bonus Code: Trekkin
Worth: 100 points
Expires: October 29, 2010 @ 11:59pm

Thanks to Club Q Rockstar Sammy for today’s Last Laff…
 
It was the first day of school, and the children brought gifts for their teacher.   The florist’s son brought the teacher a beautiful bouquet of flowers.
 
The candy-store owner’s daughter gave the teacher a pretty box of candy.
 
The liquor-store owner’s son brought up a big, heavy box.  The teacher lifted it up and noticed that it was leaking a little bit.
She touched a drop of the liquid with her finger and tasted it.
 
“Is it wine?” she guessed.
 
“No,” said the boy.
 
She tasted another drop and asked, “Is it Champagne?.
 
“No,” said the little boy.
 
“OK I give up” said the teacher.  “What is it?”
 
“It’s a puppy!!!”
 
As a Club Q Rock Star, you can rate the joke and earn points, plus just for voting you have a chance to win a Large Tombstone Pizza from Topper’s Pizza!  Log on to your account to vote NOW.   Have a funny joke? (please!!!) E-mail them now:
 
mellaney.dahl@rci.rogers.com

chris.mcewin@rci.rogers.com

This year you promised yourself you were going to do more for Halloween than throw a sheet over your head and call yourself a ghost.  Sure, we all start with great intentions and then we find ourselves a few days out, no costume and no plans.
 
Well my friends the good news is we’ve got the internet and great sites like Gizmodo.com, who are always there to lend a hand.  Check out their tips on putting together sweet looking (and in most cases easy to make) costumes from Star Wars, Batman and even Ghostbusters!
 

Thanks to Club Q Rockstar Bill for today’s Last Laff…
 
The Mexican maid asked for a pay raise. The wife was very upset about this.  “Now Maria, give me a break….why do you think you should get a raise?”
 
“Well,  Senora, there are tree reasons why I wan an increase. First, I iron better than you.”
“Really?  Who told you that you iron better than me”
“Jor husband say so.”
 
“The second reason is that  I am a better cook than you.” “Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?”
“Jor husband did.”
 
“And the tird reason is that I am better at sex than you in bed.”
 
The wife is really furious.  “Oh really…and did my husband say that too??”
 
“No Senora…dat time was de gardener.”
 
As a Club Q Rock Star, you can rate the joke and earn points, plus just for voting you have a chance to win a Large Tombstone Pizza from Topper’s Pizza!  Log on to your account to vote NOW.   Have a funny joke? (please!!!) E-mail them now:
 
mellaney.dahl@rci.rogers.com

chris.mcewin@rci.rogers.com

Thanks to Club Q Rockstar Judy for today’s Last Laff…         
 
Judy wants to talk numbers…  She has determined that if you’d purchased $1000 worth of Nortel stock a year ago, it’d now be worth $49.  So would the same amount of Delta Air stock.
 
For a $1000 Enron stock investment a year ago, that would be worth $16.50.
 
WorldCom would be worse…for the $1000 investment you’d have $5 in stock.
 
Judy knows her stocks.  But then I wondered…what if you’d bought $1,000.00 worth of wine one year ago.  You drank it all…and then recycled the bottles for the refund.  That investment would be worth $214 today!
 
So Judy and members of the jury, I would humbly suggest that based on the evidence, the best advice would be to drink heavily and recycle!
 
As a Club Q Rock Star, you can rate the joke and earn points, plus just for voting you have a chance to win a Large Tombstone Pizza from Topper’s Pizza!  Log on to your account to vote NOW.   Have a funny joke? (please!!!) E-mail them now:
 
mellaney.dahl@rci.rogers.com

chris.mcewin@rci.rogers.com

Fifteen years later, you can go buy a brand new game for the NES.  The website RetroZone has put together Battle Kid: Fortress of Peril, and it’s an actual cartridge that comes with the game, instructions, and even one of the old dust sleeve/holder for only $30.
 

 

 
The game’s site said in it you uncover a plot to build a Supermech, “so you head to an ancient high-tech fortress in an effort to prevent this weapon from being completed, navigating through the various sectors of the fortress, while battling its denizens and avoiding its many dangers.”  It also comes with 5 difficulty settings and a password system.

Today’s Last Laff was a Two-fer, so thanks to Club Q Rockstar Stephan for today’s first Last Laff…
 
A blonde woman comes in for a hair appointment wearing headphones for her Ipod.  She tells the stylist to cut her hair but under no circumstances should he remove her headphones.
 
The stylist begins cutting around the ears but he knows how silly it’s going to look so when he’s almost done he moves the headphones out of the way.  Suddenly the blonde falls down dead!
 
The stylist picks up one of the headphones and listens…to a recorded voice saying over and over… “breathe in….breathe out…breathe in…”
 
…and thanks to Rockstars  Rob and Tena for today’s second Last Laff…
 
A blonde was sitting on the bus reading the newspaper.
 
The headline said “12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed”.
 
She felt really sad and turned to the guy next to her…
 
How many is a Brazilian?”
 
As a Club Q Rock Star, you can rate the joke and earn points, plus just for voting you have a chance to win a Large Tombstone Pizza from Topper’s Pizza!  Log on to your account to vote NOW.   Have a funny joke? (please!!!) E-mail them now:
 
mellaney.dahl@rci.rogers.com

chris.mcewin@rci.rogers.com

Thanks to Club Q Rockstar Carol for today’s Last Laff… 
 
Two pilots wearing dark glasses come onto the plane…one has a guide dog and the other taps his way along the aisle with a cane.
 
The passengers laugh…because it’s obviously a Halloween joke.  The 2 men go into the cockpit, the door closes and the engines start up.
 
Nobody says anything and the plane starts taxiing into position.  Then the plane revs up and heads faster and faster down the runway.  The people sitting in the window seats realize they’re headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport.
 
As the plane gets dangerously close…and since nobody actually said it was a practical joke…panicked screams fill the cabin.
At that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.
 
The passengers relax and laugh.  A few people say “good one” and soon everyone is reading magazines and logging onto laptops.
 
In the cockpit, the blind pilots are pretty serious.
 
“Ya know, Bob” says one of them.  “One of these days, they’re gonna scream just a bit too late and we’re all gonna die”
 
As a Club Q Rock Star, you can rate the joke and earn points, plus just for voting you have a chance to win a Large Tombstone Pizza from Topper’s Pizza!  Log on to your account to vote NOW.   Have a funny joke? (please!!!) E-mail them now:
 
mellaney.dahl@rci.rogers.com

chris.mcewin@rci.rogers.com

Ever go to the beach and while you’re enjoying the sun, sand and surf just wish you could REALLY express how much you love Star Wars?  Then dig this R2-D2 one-piece swimsuit called Artoo.
 

 
Yeah!  How sweet is this thing…outside of the $85 price tag.  That’s right, it costs $85 dollars, but just think how much it would be if it was actually licensed by George Lucas!
 
Besides, if you have a woman in your life that is willing to wear an R2-D2 bathing suit – you better be spending far more than $85 on her.  And if you are a woman who would be willing to wear an R2-D2 bathing suit in public…I have a long list of single friends who’d love to meet you.