Paul Cook’s Running Diary

I used to think treadmills were for wimps. Ok, I still do, but I guess I am one now. When I ran marathons back in the ’90s, I ran no matter what the weather. I had always been told if you don’t train in bad weather, it could come back to haunt you on race day. So no matter how much wind, rain, or snow, no matter how cold or hot, I would train outside. It certainly helped me in 1993 when I ran in one of the hottest New York City marathons on record, and then in 1995 for one of the coldest. As I train for a half-marathon now, and with the effects of a two-hour run less than 24 hours ago still pounding in my knees, I have trouble ever believing that I used to run even longer — three and four hours plus training runs. Now I am  a treadmill softie. Too cold, too windy. Too wet. My father would be ashamed! His mantra was always “no such thing as bad weather,  just bad clothing.”

But it’s not just the weather that pushes me onto the hamster wheel. Ultimately, it is my excuse, but ironically, it’s boredom. Yes, I actually find running inside more interesting than the great outdoors. I’m talking about long runs here, when you have  to run for more than 45 minutes. Don’t get me wrong, I’m into nature and I love running through parks and wooded areas on a crisp autumn morning in the sunshine as much as any runner. At my club, the treadmills all  have TV monitors. Could there be a better way to hammer off 20 kilometres and not feel the time, than by doing it while watching the Vikings and the Steelers? My kids are dismayed that I don’t run with an iPod. I know research shows music can help maximize your result while minimizing your feeling of exhaustion, but I have always been an information junkie. So when I hit the pavement, I strap my AM/FM radio to my arm and seek out news and talk. One Sunday the weather was so nice, I couldn’t justify running inside on the treadmill, so I launched out on my long run listening first to a couple of newscasts on 680, and then  flipping over to listen to “Cross Canada Checkup.” I am a fan of the show and of Rex Murphy, but sometimes the topics are hit and miss. This week’s question from Rex to his panelists and audience was, for me, a miss: “Should euthanasia be legal in Canada”? Talk about a downer! No maximized output here. That kind of talk doesn’t exactly put a spring in your step! At least if I were on the treadmill, I could watch some football!

Treadmills are also closer to washrooms. Yes, the modern convenience of plumbing when nature calls is certainly another reason to praise the treadmill. Any distance runner knows it is not a good idea to go to a costume party dressed as Elvis, live large like Elvis, drink copious amounts of Guinness and then go for a long run the next day. (Long distance runner’s tip: Hospital lobby washrooms are much cleaner than gas station washrooms.)

Treadmills are also safer. Too many maniac drivers, especially when they are making a right turn onto a busy street, are so busy looking left for oncomng traffic that they don’t look right to see what might be coming on foot, namely me! I once even had a passenger wave me to go ahead as his driver stepped on the gas. The passenger saw me, but he forgot to tell the driver! My rule is eye contact with the driver or don’t go.

It is easier to quit a run early if you are on the treadmill. You hit the stop button. Get off. Drive home. Not a good thing if you are simply feeling lazy, but if you are injured or feeling sick or too much like fat Elvis the morning after a bender, it sure does help. Nothing worse than being 10 kilometres into a a 20-K run and having your knee give out. You are pretty much scuppered, unless of course you have quarters to call your loved one for a lift (if you can find a payphone), a token for the bus, or twenty bucks for a cab (I run with all of the aforementioned). I also run with a piece of paper that has my name, emergency contact and OHIP number. Gee, I wonder what’s on the treadmill TV today?