Oh no, the camera is on!!
Maybe no-one will notice me if I just…..

If you missed Billy’s opening, here are some of the highlights ….brilliant!

Oscars VIPs are gifted each year with a bag full of goodies and gift certificates. This year the total value of the swag bag is over $62,000. Some of the stuff in the bag:

DISARONNO – $15,000
An Italian liqueur. Each nominee will receive the opportunity to have one of the country’s foremost artisan mixologists tend a premium stocked bar, complete with custom Disaronno, at the location of their choosing, for up to 100 guests.

PREMIER TOURS ELEPHANT BACK SAFARI – $15,580
4 night/5 day stay for 2 at Abu Camp in Botswana, Africa. Trip includes luxury accommodations, all meals, drinks, all game viewing activities and elephant interactions.

DR. GARTH FISHER – $1,645
Dr. Garth Fisher has launched his own “Biomed Spa” to assist his patients in furthering their beauty regime via the latest and greatest non-surgical treatments and technologies — lasers, injectibles and non-invasive fat reduction, along with his own skin care line “CellCeuticals.”

NAUGHTY BITS BROWNIES – $50
Described as “Deliciously bad brownies.”

SLIMWARE – $59
Stylish portion control plates with a portion consciousness disguised in the design.

VAPORTRIM – $9.95
Vaportrim is the world’s first zero-calorie dessert. “It works with the senses of taste and smell so that users feel full and eat less.”

ORGANIC SOAP AND SPA – $2,400
With over 150 products, Organic Soap and Spa will send a variety of products, based on the recipient’s personal preferences, valued at $200 each month to the recipient. Each celebrity will have a personal concierge assigned to them.

For your Oscar weekend viewing pleasure, I present…
EVERY SINGLE BILLY CRYSTAL OSCAR OPENING!!!
enjoy…
1990 Academy Awards

1991 Academy Awards

1992 Academy Awards

1993 Academy Awards

1997 Academy Awards

1998 Academy Awards

2000 Academy Awards

2004 Academy Awards

We’ve seen this done before… but this is THE BEST!!
(I LOVE when he licks his fingers)
Enjoy!

Now THIS is a product I could use!!!
(I cant stop thinking about all the money I’d save on ties)

ABC Television should use this to advertise “The Chew”

Ever wondered who teaches goats to jump?
Well, here’s the answer. It’s …….
THIS WOMAN!

In honour of the National Organ Donor Week Act given Royal Assent 15 years ago this weekend, here’s a video of Ellen Degeneres interviewing a new Canadian hero!
Let’s hope she gets to dance with Ellen soon!
(National Organ Donor Week is the last week of April)

Thanks to Trudy Schofield for this video
Now if I could just train JAMIE to do these things….