SONiC’s Superbeer Party at Hudsons’ South Common yesterday was a great time. As always, they took great care of us. We soaked up some suds, gave away an MGD beer fridge and some Hudson’s gift certificates as we watched the Saints win their first ever Superbowl. Good times! 

ABOVE: Myself, SONiC Boy Del Stocking, Candace & Kathleen

ABOVE: A poster ad for Jagermeister that took on an entirely new meeting based on where it was posted — above a urinal (mens room at Hudson’s South Common).

The Grammy Awards

“Forensic Directions”

Special Guest: Crash Karma (featuring Edwin & Mike Turner from Our Lady Peace)

 

 Layne Mitchell Show Podcast #50 [25:08m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

I watched the Grammies on Sunday…he awards show where the most important people in music get all dressed up and gather together to be peed on by Pink. If you didn’t see the show, Pink’s performance involved her hanging from the ceiling and spinning around on a trapeze – it was very impressive. But then, water started spraying out of everywhere all over the crowd.

Take a look at this outfit. She came out on stage wearing a middle-east inspired dress. I thought to myself; it’s refreshing to see a woman wear something a little more conservative. That lasted all of about 5 seconds, at which point Pink ripped off her dress, underneath which she was wearing… a shoelace.

It’s almost as though Pink and Lady Gaga were having a contest to see who could show the most skin. In fact, during Lady gaga’s duet with Elton John I was thinking this is probably as close as Elton John’s ever come to seeing a woman naked.

The WORST movie EVER!!!

The furniture store that doubles as a place to take a date

Special Guest: Melissa Auf De Maur interview and acoustic performance

 

 Layne Mitchell Show Podcast #49 [34:06m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

I looked in the mirror yesterday and I spotted quite possibly the world’s longest eyebrow hair. It was over an inch long. My first instinct was to pluck it, so I wound the end of it around my finger and prepared to yank it out… yeah it was long enough to actually wind it around my finger. I squinted a little bit, I braced myself, but I couldn’t bring do it.

It’s not like I’m not gonna grow another one. I trim my eyebrows every week. It’s like a healthy forest – you gotta have a controlled burn every so often. I think THAT’s why I was so impressed by this massive eyebrow hair. Despite routine clear cutting, I still managed to harvest this huge thick luscious brow hair. You could cut this thing in half and count the rings. This had to be old growth — it was like the tree of souls in Avatar.

I stood there for a minute trying to dissect just why it was I couldn’t bring myself to pluck this world record eye brow hair. I certainly wasn’t afraid of the pain. I did want it gone. That’s when it occurred to me that I was proud-barrassed of it. Both proud and embarrassed at the same time. I had to show somebody. It was a matter of public record.

I’d hate to think of trying to show it to someone after the fact, cause they would never believe it was an eyebrow. They’d think I plucked a bristle off a paintbrush or something and I was working on the world’s lamest practical joke. So I did. I had a little exhibition of my friend, after which I managed to yank it out and felt better. My question for you: what are YOU proud-barrassed of?

After a brief experiment on yesterday’s show, using the Fax machine to collect requests for SONiC’s Quick Fix at 6ix. The answer is yes, there are still two people using this obsolete technology.  

For those under 30… a fax is basically just like email, only they charge you long distance. Well, that and it’s unreliable, it takes longer, and it prints every single message whether you like it or not. Image the trees you would kill, if you printed off every little spam and Farmville request you got.

I think most of the people still using fax machines are in industries where signatures are required – the medical industry for instance. To be honest, it makes me nervous that the people responsible for our health are still using such antiquated technology. They should have the latest, greatest, most space aged scanning equipment available with flashing lights and lots of beeping – so you know it’s working. Yet they’re using fax machines.

Who knows, they might still be using carrier pigeons but the orderlies got tired of mopping up the bird droppings off of the foreheads of their bed-ridden patients.

Everybody’s talking about the latest little piece of technology from Apple; a tablet computer called… the iPad. If you’re just hearing about this for the first time, bad news, you AREN’T the first one to make the maxi-pad joke.  

Am I missing something or isn’t this just basically it’s an iPhone with a 10 inch screen. Being the iPhone disciple I am, having a slightly larger screen would be helpful. Although when I’m heading out for a jog with my iPhone, I don’t find myself thinking “jeese I wish this thing were bigger and more cumbersome.”

We’re hearing more and more about Haiti since the tragic earthquake there last week, but how much do we REALLY know about the country? I put SONiC listener, Victoria’s knowledge to the test. Each correct answer earning a donation to the Red Cross for relief efforts.

Special Guest: You Say Party! We Say Die! (SONiC Session Performance) 

Zipperhood of the Unravelling Pants

The Wal-Mart Greeter who is ALSO a Millionaire

 

 Layne Mitchell Show Podcast #48 [15:49m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

I went and saw “The Lovely Bones” over the weekend. Pretty good. The movie is actually based on a book, and everybody always says the book was WAY better than the movie. Even people who’ve never read the book say that – it’s like you’re trying to convince the world that you can read. I never read it, but I’m curious about how they might show some of the scenes that ended up in the movie.

A story about a teenage girl, murdered by a serial killer. But instead of going to heaven or hell she goes to… Wonderland. It’s not actually Wonderland, but it might as well be. She’s stuck in the “in-between”; this place where you can walk on water and it rains lollipops basically – it’s like a 2 and a half hour music video. She’s at her house, and then the house melts away and then suddenly she’s tobogganing on a rainbow. I’ve never been snuffed out by a serial killer, but if it’s really the fun, carefree acid trip THE movie portrayed it to be – I’d be doing a lot more hitchhiking.