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Everything is going to be okay.

Or is it…

Christina Hendricks wants to lose weight

If you watch Mad Men you already know her as Joan Holloway. If you’re a Browncoat you know her as Saffron, Yolanda, Bridgette or possibly Yosaffbridge. She is 5’8″ of amazing measuring out at 39D-30-39. I don’t know exactly what that means but I do know that my wife would leave me for her given the chance. Christina Hendricks is a paragon of curvaceous beauty.

And then I hear that she wants to go on a diet.

According to the article, she wants to ditch about two stone (which comes out to 28 pounds) and normally that’s really none of my concern unless my wife really does hook up with her and make Christmas really awkward for everyone. My concern is just this:

“‘Christina has got sick of all the talk of her being the curviest woman in Hollywood. For her it basically meant she was being called fat,’ says a source. ‘Now she’s gone against everything she believed in before by going on the first diet of her life.’”

Oh hell no.

I will recognize that this is one of those “anonymous source” quotes that at least half the time amount to nothing. I do very much hope that that’s the case here. As one of the few women in Hollywood with what is technically referred to as va-va-VOOM she’s a bit of an icon for every woman and girl that is not comprised entirely of skin and bone. Like a figurehead on the front of a ship of pure awesome sailing to the seas of healthy and gorgeous looks she can be up there on the front lines fighting for a woman’s right to not need to be able to play their ribs like a marimba in order to look damn fine.

I want to reach out to Christina Hendricks. To tell her that’s she’s awesome. That she requires no weight loss. Barring that I want to reach out to anyone who says she’s fat.

Reach out and rattle their brains.