The above pictures were taken by a real photographer. Brittany, Taylor and Thea are three members of the CHEZ 106 / Ottawa Sun Sunshine Girl beach volleyball team that will be playing at HOPE this year.  I got the chance to go to their photo shoot on Tuesday, I guess the plan was for me to mill about and take some pictures of my own. So I did.

     Again, these pictures were NOT taken by me. They were sent to me after the shoot by Mark Williamson from the Sun - he took them during the two-day shoot.  Brittany is on the left, Taylor in the middle and Thea on the right. A couple more of Taylor, sent over by Mark:

     See, this is what a real photo shoot is like.  It takes place on a big white sheet under big bright lights and a lady holds a fan to make hair blow and the photographer points at stuff. The wardrobe is carefully planned. High heels are a must. Swimsuit models and strippers always need heels. Even though they are likely the two professions (well, and maybe construction) where high-heels are the least convenient thing a person could wear. Especially when you’re on your way to play beach volleyball. Here’s more photos of Thea:

     Once again, these photos were not taken by me. These photos were taken by Kaitlyn, our promo assistant, who accompanied me to the photo shoot at Events In Style on Murray street.  This is Kaitlyn:

     Kaitlyn is an actual volleyball player. And at least a halfway decent photographer. She’ll be at HOPE with another team. She tells me they will not be wearing high heels for their game. Now, the pictures I took.

     It appears I cannot be trusted with a camera. If this radio thing doesn’t work out, I will not be able to fall back on any kind of photography career.  I also took these pictures:

This is either Kaitlyn preparing to bump a volleyball, or demonstrating how to take a dump in the woods.

Swimsuit models eat healthy food.

Brittany was getting ready for her shoot as we left.

Kaitlyn took that one. The woman in the green dress was the one holding the fan for the models. She may have been the best looking woman there! Okay. My career in photography clearly will not take off, I’m done.

     I see from perusing our website that we need some clarification on what, exactly, the Canadian Golf & Country Club free golf clinic days are all about.  Here’s the deal – it’s very simple. 

     You show up on a certain day, at a certain time, and the Canadian’s pros teach you golf.  For free.  With however many people show up at that clinic.  I went to one last Thursday, asked for help straightening out my drive, and within a few minutes it was straight again.  It’s that simple.  Here are the days and times that you can show up – all are welcome beginners and scratch golfers, no need to sign up or do anything other than be there!

Saturday, June 9 – 1:00-3:00
Thursday, June 14 from 5:30-7:30
Saturday, June 23 from 1-3
Saturday, June 30 from 1-3
Thursday, July 5 from 5:30-7:30

     I’ll see you there!  (Well, at all but this coming Saturday’s clinic – this coming Saturday, I’ll see you at Scotiabank for the RV show)

     Well, I got my M1 license.  But it appears that I am still not to be trusted with a motorcycle, even a non-tippable one with three wheels.  And from what I understand, I will be riding in a side-car.  Which is fine, except that now I need one of those old German helmets with the spike on top. 

     Last year, the Motorcycle Ride for Dad raised more than $400,000 for prostate cancer research in Ottawa alone, and they want to beat that record this year.  And I want to help them do it!  Click here for my pledge page and donate to a terrific cause!  Ride For Dad coming up June 2nd!

SIDECAR!

#5 – Bucket listers

     Yeah, I know that Iron Maiden was at a recent Bluesfest.  And that Alice Cooper has played Ottawa nine times in the last six years.  And that John Mellencamp has been here recently also.  But not everyone can go to every show they want to see, and there are still a ton of people in Ottawa who would very much like to check out one or all three of those acts.  And the beauty of Bluesfest is this – Alice Cooper and Iron Maiden are on the same night – and it’s a Saturday!  (Also playing between their sets is blues singer Marcia Ball, who’s been here before also but is still on MY bucket list.)

#4 – Hip-hop hooray!

     One of my fondest memories of Bluesfest is watching Ice Cube play an afternoon show in front of people who didn’t really know who he was, or what they were in for.  This year, we get everyone from Snoop Dogg (who will just be a bonkers show) to hip-hop supergroup Deltron 3030 (starring Del The Funky Homosapien, also known for the group Gorillaz). 

     The one I’m looking forward to the most is former Jurassic 5 rapper Chali 2na.  I was heading over to see him play last year when the stage blew over and the Bluesfest organizers rushed the crowd inside the war museum.  I saw him walking through the crowd there, talking to people, shaking hands, and towering over everyone else.  Now, I finally get to see him perform!

#3 – Allman connection

     Two of the real great blues acts at the festival are Trucks and Tedeschi – Guitar wunderkind Derek Trucks, who started out with the Allman Brothers band, and his wife Susan Tedeschi, one of the great blues singers in the world.  Also playing this year is The Royal Southern Brotherhood, a band fronted by Gregg Allman’s son Devon.

#2 – Cult classics

     The very first day of the festival includes two of my all-time favourite cult music acts, Fishbone and The Melvins.  Both sort of defy categorization…which is what makes them cult acts, I suppose.  The Melvins are likely a little more familiar to people, as one of the big inspirations for Nirvana and the rest of the grunge scene.  Also cult-tastic…Billy Bragg, Mastodon, David Gray and Charles Bradley.

#1 – Decisions decisions

     It’s one of the greatest things about Bluesfest.  Do I watch Alice Cooper to the end, then check out the Bright Light Social Hour before Maiden?  Or do I leave a little early, see Marcia Ball, then duck back in time for Maiden’s second song?  John Mellencamp or the Sheepdogs, who play at the exact same time?  Do I go see dubstep superstar Skrillex, easy-listening 70s icons 10cc, or the heavy sludge metal stylings of Mastodon?  I don’t know – I have to pick just one!  Or two at the most!  However will I decide?

     It has all come down to this – three more days of name call-outs, four more events.  Tomorrow, Cosmo will be at Kichesippi from 2-7 (be there before 6:45 for your ballot).  On Thursday, Doc will be at Star Motors from 3-7 (be there before 6:45), and on Friday I get to go back to Kanata Honda in the Palladium automall for the second year in a row, from 2:00-6:00 (be there before 5:45).  Then it’s the CHEO cottage all day Monday for your very last chance!

     I love these events.  They’re some of the best things I get to do every year, where I go hang out and talk to everyone who wants to win a key for Toys For Boys.  I stay for four hours, I do only eight minutes of real, actual work, and the atmosphere is nothing if not festive.  Only when I dribbled some cedar sauna aroma on Jenna’s shirt at Chinook Hot Tubs & Saunas last Friday did things turn even the least bit sour.

     Know why I love this?  THIS is the prize package – not the whole Toys For Boys package, but JUST what we’re getting from Kanata Honda this year.  A motorcycle, a snowblower, a lawnmower and a generator.  I guess they felt like the motorcycle they gave us last year was a weak prize.  After all, it was just a $5,000 machine.  So they’ve spruced it up!  And now we have all this machinery to give away, all of which will be showcased Friday, between 2-6.  I’ll see you there!

     Maybe this will help you with the Doc and Woody show’s contest for playoff tickets for Wednesday’s game…we’re asking for people to call in with their motivational speeches.  I suggested all of these this morning as examples we could play on the air.  Since then, I have been completely ignored.  So I thought I’d put them up here, to help out somehow…here goes.

Van Wilder:

Patton:

Braveheart:

300:

Poolhall Junkies:

     Due to a scheduling conflict with current tour dates, Eliades Ochoa’s April 27th show has been postponed to a later show in the fall. Date and time of the fall show is yet to be announced, I will keep you posted on all the details.

     For all of thsoe who have purchased entries in the CHEZ Nation draw, your points will be refunded.

     If you’re still looking for something to do Friday the 27th, though, I can recommend coming to see me at Kanata Honda from 2-6…fill out a ballot and get a really great shot at one of TWO keys for Toys For Boys!  I’ll also be at Chinook Hot Tubs this Friday from 3-7.

     Just a reminder – music legend Eliades Ochoa comes to Ottawa April 27th, at the museum of Civilization to play among the totem poles.  And I get to go!  And so do you, if you like – enter the promo code “corporate” to get $10 when you buy tickets here.  And another reminder why the Buena Vista Social Club veteran is awesome:

     On Thursday, the 6:40 tough question was “on average, women change THIS three times in their lives.”  The correct answer was “hair colour”.

     On the online version of the tough question, however, I need to put a second option – but since it was a long weekend, I thought I would make it easy.  The other choice was “the device she uses to throw wombats”.  Which was, of course, a ridiculous answer that no one would ever pick.  Which, of course, was actually picked by TEN people.  I can go into the bowels of our system and pull their names out to post them on this blog and call them out.  Or I can stay classy.

     Anyway, I’m writing this post because I got a fantastic email that made me laugh a lot – with the subject line “contributing to a hostile wombat environment”:

Just more proof the Koala’s run the media.
Throwing wombats?  Really I take that personally.  Wonder what would happen if we started flinging Interns?
OK this full lawsuit can go away with just one key for toys 4 boys .

     Thanks for the laugh Trevor.  Now, I cannot help you with a key for Toys For Boys.  Colon D or no Colon D.  However, perhaps I can begin to make amends.  Here is, for the SECOND time on my blog, a picture of Yo-Yo Ma and a wombat in a bathroom.

     It’s not every day that a musical legend comes to Ottawa, and it’s even more rare that I get the opportunity to actually meet him and host his show.  So I’m terrifically excited to be bringing Eliades Ochoa, the legendary guitarist and singer of the Buena Vista Social Club, onto the stage at the Museum of Civilization Friday, April 27th.

     Now, some of you may have been to a show at the museum of Civilization before.  I have hosted several Comfortably Numb shows there, which have been terrific in the theatre. But this show is not in the theatre area – it’s actually going to take place at 8:30 in the Grand Hall, in among the totem poles with his 8-piece band.  Now that’s pretty damn cool.  For those of you not familiar with Cuba’s legendary Buena Vista Social Club and Eliades Ochoa, here’s a video:

     Tickets are available at ticketmaster, by phone at  1 855 985 5000 or online here http://www.ticketmaster.ca/Eliades-Ochoa-tickets/artist/771017 enter the promo code “corporate”, for a $10 discount!