Archive for November, 2010
Tuesday, November 30th, 2010
It occurred to me while I watched the Grey Cup that although I am a bigger fan of the NFL, there are some things the CFL does WAY better. For example – when the referees announce a penalty, the CFL is vastly superior because the refs are allowed to say the NAME of the team that committed the penalty. “Unnecessary roughness, Montreal number 56, fifteen yard penalty, first down.” Simple, right?
Contrast that to the NFL, where the refs don’t seem to be allowed to mention teams by name. Let’s say there’s a kickoff, and it gets fumbled, and the kicking team recovers and runs it back. And there’s a penalty during the run back. The refs will come out and say something like this – “block in the back, by the defense, which was the receiving team, after the fumble recovery by the kicking team, which became the offense, during the runback off the turnover, number 21, half the distance to the goal, first down.”
It also occurred to me that the main reason I don’t care as much about the CFL these days is that we have no team here in Ottawa. I cheer for the Bombers, a little, and against the Argos and Alouettes, but without a real home team I can get behind, it’s tougher, and more of an effort, for me to follow the rest of the league.
I think the best tweet of all time belongs to Stevie Johnson of the Buffalo Bills. He dropped a gimme, gift-wrapped pass from Ryan Fitzpatrick in the end zone, in overtime, that would have given the Bills a gigantic upset win over the Steelers this weekend. Then he took to Twitter and – blamed God!
“I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO...”
Amazing. I have always thought it was the dumbest thing ever when athletes thanked God for a win. If it was up to God, why the hell did you train so hard, and run all those sprints, and lift all those weights? Why wouldn’t you just show up and pray real hard? But even more so, I have thought that it’s terribly disingenuous for athletes to thank God for their victories but NOT to blame him for their defeats. Thank you, Steve Johnson. You’re the first one to do so, and you make me happy.
I think the reason Ottawa Senators fans are so quiet at hockey games is that beer costs forty-one dollars a pint. This might also contribute to the fact that Ottawa is the only Canadian team of note that doesn’t consistently sell out games. I have a solution that will fix both problems, and be a huge boon to Ottawa’s economy, overnight – tailgating. Legalize parking lot tailgating, and we’ll have a raucous, jam-packed arena every night. Problem solved.
I think the Yankees are very, very stupid. I hate the Yankees on principle, because they throw so much money at big-name free agents that no one else can compete. Except, occasionally, my beloved Red Sox. And on principle, I therefore hate Derek Jeter, the face of the Yankees for the past decade. But I am squarely on Jeter’s side in his contract dispute with New York. A franchise icon, the face of the most famous team in sports, still playing at an extremely high level, and you lowball him?
So the Yanks are willing to drive dumptrucks full of cash to the houses of CC Sabathia, Alex Rodriguez, Mark Texeira et al, but you want Derek Jeter to take a huge pay cut to stay? And you try to embarass him and tell him to test the free agency waters? You dicks. I hope he does – I’d love to see him in a Boston uniform – but this is a lot like one of those insurance companies that gives new customers an incredible rate, but keeps the rates of their longtime existing customers stupidly high.
I think the Heat struggling is good for basketball the way the Cowboys struggling is good for football. I love it when the most hated team is easy to cheer against – each loss makes more and more people happy. Then again, I think they had better make the playoffs – for the same reason.
Okay. That’s all I think right now.
Tuesday, November 30th, 2010
Guh. Got hammered last week. I’m now 104-72 straight up, 95-74-7 against the spread. Friggin’ Molly beat me. Here goes again…
Houston at Philadelphia (8) Thursday – Philly’s coming off a loss, where Michael Vick looked human. Houston is coming off a shutout over Chris Johnson and Randy Moss. 8 points is too much, with or without Andre Johnson (in this case, with). Eagles, 33-30.
Real final score – Eagles, 34-24. I think the Eagles, in prime time games, are not to be messed with when Vick is at the helm. Monday night’s beatdown of the Skins and now this? Philly’s vulnerable at 1:00 on Sundays, and maybe at 4:00, but the rest of the time they’re lights out.
Buffalo at Minnesota (6.5) – Yeah, the Vikings are coming off a fairly impressive win. And the Bills still have only two wins. But the Bills are starting to really, really look good week in and week out. And the Vikings are nothing if not inconsistent. One way or the other, 6.5 points is way too much. Vikings, 21-20.
Real final score – Vikings, 38-14. Vikings are still inconsistent. It was the Bills that laid an egg here – knocked out Favre, intercepted Favre and Tavaris Jackson over and over, and did NOTHING with it.
Cleveland at Miami (4) – The Browns had real trouble with the terrible Panthers this past week, and the Dolphins handily dismantled a decent Raiders team. This comes down to the health of Colt McCoy and Chad Henne. I think Henne’s a safer bet to be healthier, so I’ll take Miami. Dolphins, 27-21.
Real final score – Browns, 13-10. Cleveland really tried hard to lose, and only a gift-wrapped turnover in the final seconds allowed them to not screw it up.
Jacksonville at Tennessee (3) - Neither team impressed me the last couple of weeks. The Jaguars should have put the Giants away HARD after going up 17, and the Titans just plain didn’t show up against the Texans. This is a division game, so it could go either way, but I’ll take…the Jaguars, 21-17.
Real final score – Jaguars, 17-6. Again, once the Jags got up 17 points, they stopped looking great. But the Titans couldn’t do much with their opportunities. This is still an offense that involves Chris Johnson and Randy Moss, right?
Denver at Kansas City (7.5) – The Broncos put a stamp on it this week. They are awful, awful awful and getting worse. The Chiefs, on the other hand, are for real. Chiefs, 30-10.
Real final score – Chiefs, 10-6. What an awful game. Perhaps the Chiefs are trying to show the league that they are NOT for real?
Washington at New York Giants (7.5) – That win over the Jags notwithstanding, I think the Giants are going in the wrong direction. And the Redskins are just Jekyll and Hyde. I expect Jekyll to show up for this game (he’s the good one). Giants, 23-21.
Real final score – Giants, 31-7. OK, it was Hyde. The Skins showed up for a moment in the third quarter, but it was way too late.
Chicago (3) at Detroit – For some reason, although the Bears have proved, at least to my satisfaction, that they really are as good as their record – they still get no love from the betting public. Only 3 points? Bears, 27-20.
Real final score – Bears, 24-20. If only the Bears had tacked on a late field goal…I would have been exactly right…I’m OK with being just mostly right, I guess.
San Francisco at Green Bay (9) – Yeah – even 9 points isn’t enough here. The Packers proved in their game against the Falcons that they are one of the top two teams in the NFC. The Niners are not even one of the top two teams in their awful, awful division. Packers, 36-17.
Real final score – Packers, 34-16. Yeah, that’s how I figured it would go. Didn’t expect the Pack to look so ugly though – those retro uniforms are atrocious!
New Orleans (7) at Cincinnati – Should be an easy one to pick, right? Well, yeah. The Saints should win the game. But the Bengals, if they put everything together, could pull out a big upset. I think they are close to putting everything together. Saints, 33-28.
Real final score – Saints, 34-30. The Bengals ARE pretty damn close to putting it all together. How about that call on fourth and two with 38 seconds left though? Sean Payton, you are remarkable.
Atlanta (3) at Tampa Bay – After beating one of the best teams in the league at home, the Falcons must prove they can beat a really good team on the road. And I think they will…barely. Falcons, 20-18.
Real final score – Falcons, 28-24. And…they barely did. Tampa Bay fought really hard, it took a 102-yard kickoff return to turn the tide. Falcons are fantastic.
Oakland at San Diego (10) – The Raiders are playing way better this year. But the Chargers are out of this world right now. Chargers, 36-20.
Real final score – Raiders, 28-13. Anyone who predicted this outcome knows nothing about football. Or, they know more about football than anyone else, ever. Or, they’re Tom Cable.
Carolina at Seattle (6) – The Panthers looked pretty good against the Browns. But then, Seattle isn’t the Browns, and they’re pretty good at home. If they beat all the bad teams they play, they have a shot at the division. Seahawks, 28-20.
Real final score – Seahawks, 31-14. Considering the final score, remember when Carolina looked like they were going to win this one going away? This says more about the Panthers than the Seahawks.
Dallas at Indianapolis (7) – All of a sudden, the Colts really, really need wins. Thankfully for them, the Jaguars lost last week and they’re tied atop their division. This is as close to a must-win as it gets for Indy. Colts, 30-21.
Real final score – Cowboys, 38-35. Did anyone watching this on TV not believe that Peyton Manning was marching for a score on that final drive? Does anyone not believe now that the Colts are in serious trouble?
St. Louis (2.5) at Arizona – The Cards are done, the Rams have a lot to play for – and they proved this week they can win impressively on the road, while the Cardinals proved they can lose decisively at home. Rams, 33-24.
Real final score – Rams, 19-6. The Rams could go 1-3 the rest of the way, and still win this division. It could happen!
Pittsburgh at Baltimore (3) - Ignore that tight game with the Bills. The Steelers are still elite. And – get this – they are 5-1 on the road. This game will simply come down to whoever has the ball last. And I’m betting it will be Baltimore. Ravens, 26-24.
Real final score – Steelers, 13-10. The Ravens DID have the ball last. And the Steelers took it. For the first time this season, I saw Baltimore play dominant defense. But Pittsburgh’s better.
New York Jets at New England (3.5) – I said it before the Jets’ first victory over the Patriots, and I’m saying it again now. This team is, plain and simple, built to beat New England. No other team in football matches up as well. Jets, 23-20.
Real final score – Patriots, 45-3. Okay. I got nothing.
I’m 11-5 straight up, 7-9 against the spread this week. 115-77 overall, and 102-83-7 against the spread.
Thursday, November 25th, 2010
One of the most interesting graphics I’ve come across this year – here’s how it works. Every team on the circle beat the team to its right. So, the Steelers beat the Falcons 15-9, the Falcons beat the Bucaneers 27-21, The Bucs beat the Browns who beat the Saints and so forth. And…it comes full circle!
That’s pretty cool, I thought. Remember to make your pool picks today, it’s Thanksgiving with three big games that, according to the graphic above, could go either way.
Thursday, November 25th, 2010
I’m a little disappointed in my overall record so far – only 97-63 straight up (although that is good enough for first place among the CHEZ employee pool players, it’s a full 10 back of the pool leaders). I’m a little happier with my record against the spread, which is a solid 89-64-7 so far this season. OK, here goes again…
New England (6.5) at Detroit – The Lions laid down for the Cowboys, who are nowhere near as good as the Patriots. But New England still has serious issues with pass defense. Patriots, 34-24.
Real final score – Patriots, 45-24. Well, the Lions waited until the 4th quarter to lay down. Then, boy, did they ever lay down.
New Orleans (3.5) at Dallas – The Cowboys appear to have turned things around a little under Wade Phillips. But one fluke win against the Giants and a beatdown of the terrible Lions doesn’t have me convinced yet. Saints, 36-20.
Real final score - Saints, 30-27. It looked like that blowout in the first quarter, didn’t it? I now AM convinced that Dallas is a different team than they were in the first eight games. Not that it matters to their season.
Cincinnati at New York Jets (9.5) – The Bengals are making a case that they are the worst team in football. But they’re good enough (and hopefully proud enough) to keep this one closer than TEN points. Jets, 23-17.
Real final score – Jets, 26-10. At one point, all three of the underdog teams held a lead in these Thanksgiving games. I think the length of time they held that lead speaks to the heart and calibre of those teams. And by that standard, the Bengals are worse than the Lions AND the Cowboys. Then again, they’re worse than almost every team out there, aren’t they?
Minnesota at Washington (2.5) – Who knows? How do the Vikings respond to the firing of Childress? Do they come out firing like the Cowboys did after Wade Phillips was canned? Or do they continue to act like a bunch of sissy baby whiners and lose? I will say…Redskins, 23-20.
Real final score – Vikings, 17-13. Or, maybe the Vikings will just manage to get a middling win against a middling team. And I’m very wrong.
Pittsburgh (6.5) at Buffalo – The Bills have to be feeling awfully good after coming back on the Bengals, then running away with that game. Pittsburgh, however, is NO Cincy. Steelers, 27-21.
Real final score – Steelers, 19-16 (OT). Gotta love these Bills. Lots of fight in that team.
Tennessee at Houston (2.5) – Remember when the Titans were 5-2, and the Texans were 4-2? Distant memories, at the moment…heartbreak for both these teams last week. The Titans are the ones to right the ship here. Titans, 28-27.
Real final score – Texans, 20-0. If ANYONE picked the defense of the HOUSTON TEXANS to pitch a shutout, they known NOTHING about football. And got real lucky.
Jacksonville at New York Giants (7.5) – The Jaguars are a VERY surprising team this year – you realize they are first in their division? The division with the Colts in it? And that they have won three in a row? And that the Giants have lost two in a row? And are NOT first in their division? And somehow they are still favoured by 7.5? Giants, 24-21.
Real final score – Giants, 24-20. The Giants showed a little character here – this could turn their season back around. Again. Could.
Carolina at Cleveland (11) – Imagine last year, or earlier this year, the BROWNS being favoured by ELEVEN! Against ANYONE! Well, they deserve it now. Browns, 23-10.
Real final score – Browns, 24-23. The Panthers made a real game of this, even taking the lead in the 4th. But they’re still bad.
Tampa Bay at Baltimore (7.5) – Again, a really odd point spread. The Bucs are 7-3. 4-1 on the road. The Ravens are 7-3. 4-0 at home. Tighter game than the spread predicts. Ravens, 21-18.
Real final score – Ravens, 17-10. JUST tighter than the spread predicted.
Philadelphia (3.5) at Chicago – The Bears have yet to convince me they are any good. A shutout against the Dolphins’ practice squad didn’t impress too much. Eagles, 30-17.
Real final score – Bears, 31-26. OK. The Bears are good. FINE.
Green Bay at Atlanta (2) – Too bad for the Packers they get Atlanta IN Atlanta. The Falcons just plain don’t lose at home. But Green Bay will give them a real run for it. This is the game that determines who’s best in the NFC. And I believe that’s Green Bay. Packers, 24-23.
Real final score – Falcons, 20-17. Matt Ryan just doesn’t lose at home. Sad when one penalty loses the game for you.
Miami at Oakland (3) – With the amount of injuries the Dolphins have sustained, I wouldn’t pick them against anyone at this point. Too bad, because healthy the Dolphins are vastly superior to the Raiders. Raiders, 26-18.
Real final score – Dolphins, 33-17. I guess all they need is a healthy Chad Henne, and all is OK in Dolphinland.
Kansas City (1) at Seattle – Both teams are good at home, weak on the road. The Chiefs ARE a better team, but in Seattle? Seahawks, 21-18.
Real final score – Chiefs, 42-24. Or not…Seattle could still win their division simply by beating the worst teams they face.
St. Louis at Denver (3.5) – For the second week in a row, I’m seriously thinking about taking a flyer on the Rams. Denver is awful. But then, St. Louis is awful on the road…tough call. Broncos, 24-23.
Real final score – Rams, 36-33. OK. St. Louis is better on the road than the Broncos are…at all.
San Diego at Indianapolis (3) – At Indy, I’m taking Indy. This will be the LAST loss for the Chargers this season. Colts, 27-25.
Real final score – Chargers, 36-14. OK. So the Chargers just plain aren’t going to lose again.
San Francisco (1) at Arizona - A real pick-em. Also, I would say, a real “who cares” – except that in that awful division, the winner of this game could actually be only one win out of a playoff spot! Cardinals, 34-30.
Real final score – Niners, 27-6. Awful. The Cards are simply awful. On offense and defense and special teams (one field goal block notwithstanding). And the Niners are, indeed, one win out of the division lead.
Brutal. This week, I’m 7-9 straight up, (104-72 overall.) And I’m a weak 6-10 against the spread, leaving me at 95-74-7 so far.
Sunday, November 21st, 2010
I’ve been pretty sick for about a week now. I can fight through it for a few hours at a time, to do the show in the morning, or to join the Hosers on Friday night for our big trivia event. (We did quite well, for a bunch of folks thrown together at the last moment – still waiting to find out if we beat the team our office sent.)
The thing is, the rest of my family is of course very sick also. My wife fought through it yesterday to get a half day’s work in, but was distracted enough by the illness that she took all the car keys with her. So I had a last-minute panic trying to get to my live commercial at the leather blowout sale at Westgate at 11:00 yesterday morning. I got a ride from my mother-in-law’s boyfriend at the last second, and made it just in time.
Then, after the event, there was another scramble (as I still had no car) to get downtown where I was hosting a gala at the NAC for Operation Come Home. I managed to get to my wife’s work and get a car (and a haircut and a shower) just in time to make it downtown – where I was confronted with the crowds preparing for the Santa Claus parade. I tried a bunch of different roads, and after an hour of stagnant traffic, I parked at about Metcalfe and the Queensway and walked the rest of the way to the NAC.
Now that they’ve changed the time of the Santa Claus Parade, the crowd is different as well. Bailey, who works at OCH and is one of the best looking women in Ottawa, got caught in the parade traffic also, and had to get out of her taxi and walk the last three blocks in her little evening dress. It was like walking through a construction site, with the catcalls and comments – you didn’t get that too often when the Santa Claus parade was at 11:00 and went down Bank street!
The gala was about an hour and a half late getting started, as everyone was caught in the same ludicrous traffic I was. Good event – Rumbavan played Cuban music, Jana and Greg taught everyone the meringue, and lots of terrific silent auction items up for grabs. Three OCH youth, Troy and Rick and Tanner, spoke about the influence OCH has had on their lives, and did a great job. I huddled in the corner and tried not to infect anyone.
I left as early as I could, getting home to my sick family. Of course, that meant I had to walk thirty blocks in the sub-zero temperature, and by the time I got back to my car I was coughing and hacking like never before. So bad, in fact, that on the way home I had to pull the car over and vomit. I’m throwing up, car still running, leaning out the drivers’ side, and two cops go by. I had visions of breathalyzers and handcuffs, and I was actually disappointed when they kept driving.
On my way home, I stopped at a drug store to get a bunch of cold medicine for myself and my wife. The lady in front of me in line noticed it all, and said “bad cold, eh?” I said “it sure is”. And she stepped away from me like she’d been shot. These are her exact words – “oh my god, you sound awful! I’ve never heard anyone with a cold so bad! You know – you actually sound like that guy on the radio, it’s so bad!”
Thursday, November 18th, 2010
Yeah, Harry Potter opens tomorrow, and I’m interested in that too. But everyone will go watch that and it’ll be one of the biggest movies of all time. LESS likely to be a gigantic film…Cowboys And Aliens. Although it does star Daniel Craig and Harrison Ford and Olivia Wilde…and it is directed by Jon Favreau (Iron Man)…and produced by Steven Spielberg…check this out!
Another upcoming movie that looks pretty cool is Your Highness, starring James Franco and Danny McBride. OK, it’s not those two that make this look cool…fast forward to the 1:20 mark of the trailer to see Natalie Portman in a thong.
Thursday, November 18th, 2010
So far this year, I am a disappointing 85-59 straight up, but a solid 80-58-6 against the spread. Here goes again.
Chicago at Miami (2) Thursday night – The Bears looked OK against a lackluster Vikings team this week, the Dolphins looked great despite losing two QBs against the Titans. Both Miami and the Bears have been road warriors this season, and I don’t like Miami’s chances without the Chads. I still don’t think the Bears are very good, but…Bears, 21-20.
Real final score – Bears, 16-0. Bad enough when you’re starting QBs are both knocked out – when both your starting centres and some receivers and everyone else are knocked out…you get shut out.
Oakland at Pittsburgh (7.5) – The Raiders shouldn’t beat the Steelers in Pittsburgh. but this team is vastly improved over recent years, and could make it close. Steelers, 24-20.
Real final score – Steelers, 35-3. Or, the Steelers could take another step forward after the New England game, and hammer the Raiders into dust. Either way.
Houston at New York Jets (6.5) – Houston simply can’t play defense. The Jets can. Sanchez will have a huge game, the Jets D will slow down the Texans offense just enough, and New York should win at the wire. Jets, 30-27.
Real final score – Jets, 30-27. If anything can make me feel like a genius…it’s this…
Baltimore (10) at Carolina – The Panthers are just awful. And Baltimore needs this one. Ravens, 23-10.
Real final score – Ravens, 37-13. Took them a while, but Baltimore got there eventually.
Washington at Tennessee (6) – The Redskins are embarrassed and angry. They showed a little heart on offense late in the Eagles blowout, that should carry over. Just enough to make it close. Titans, 33-28.
Real final score – Redskins, 19-16 (OT). Once Vince Young got hurt, this one was all of a sudden in doubt.
Detroit at Dallas (6.5) – For the first time this season, I’m taking Dallas to win. Detroit is one of the few teams that are still obviously worse than the Cowboys. Cowboys, 23-20.
Real final score – Cowboys, 35-19. Well, I am surprised at the blowout. I guess Detroit is committed to being the team they were the last two years, and they`ll use the last ten minutes of every game to get there.
Green Bay (3) at Minnesota – The Packers will be a little healthier, a little stronger, coming off the bye. That doesn’t bode well for the Vikings. Packers, 30-20.
Real final score – Packers, 31-3. Is Favre now the WORST QB in the NFL? It’s…possible!
Buffalo at Cincinnati (6) – I think six points is a little much. The Bills have kept it very, very close against some good teams, and the Bengals are NOT a good team. Bengals, 23-20.
Real final score – Bills, 49-31. Remember when I wrote the Bengals are NOT a good team? They are in fact a terrible team. That 21-point lead was so comfortable, eh?
Cleveland at Jacksonville (1.5) – The Browns just beat the Saints and the Patriots. They played the Steelers and Jets really tight. And Jacksonville is much lower down the league totem pole than any of those four teams. Browns, 21-17.
Real final score – Jaguars, 24-20. Wrong all around. McCoy and the Browns just aren’t there yet.
Arizona at Kansas City (8) – The Cardinals are just terrible, at home and on the road. The Chiefs really need to bounce back from a dreadful effort against the Broncos this week. It’ll be closer than it should be. Chiefs, 27-21.
Real final score – Chiefs, 31-13. The Cards are even worse than I thought.
Seattle at New Orleans (11.5) – The Seahawks are much better than this 11.5-point spread would have us believe. The Saints are on the right track, and should win, but not by that much. Saints, 35-30.
Real final score – Saints, 34-19. The Saints are getting back on track. Seattle could win their division, even though they’re a bad team.
Atlanta (3) at St. Louis – Atlanta has trouble winning on the road convincingly. The Rams are incredible at home, and need this one because they can’t win on the road. Very close game, very tough call. Rams, 21-20.
Real final score – Falcons, 34-17. With a convincing road win like this, the Falcons are making a good case for their being the best team in the NFC.
Tampa Bay at San Francisco (3) - No matter how many games they lose, people still talk about the Niners like they have a chance to win their division. And people still bet on them, and the spreads favour them, because people are delusional. Two straight wins (against bad teams) aside, the Niners are simply not nearly as good as Tampa. Buccaneers, 26-17.
Real final score – Buccaneers, 21-0. The Niners are not as good as some high school teams.
Indianapolis at New England (3) – Another really, really tough game to call. New England is coming off their best game of the season, the Colts just plain have the goods, game in and game out. I’ll take the Patriots at home, but I don’t really care who wins – watching Brady vs. Manning is good enough any week of the season. Patriots, 27-26.
Real final score – Patriots, 31-28. Manning and the Colts made it close, and until that final interception, did anyone really think the Colts would do anything but score again to win the game? New England has serious pass defense problems.
New York Giants at Philadelphia (3) – Michael Vick won’t torch the Giants the way he did the Skins. New York can rush four and drop more into coverage, without relying on blitzes like Washington. Michael Vick destroys the blitz. That being said, Vick is the best QB in the league, right now, and he WILL win this game against a staggered Giants team. Eagles, 33-24.
Real final score – Eagles, 27-17. Pretty close…the Giants always turn the ball over a ton against the Eagles.
Denver at San Diego (10) – In the next six weeks, the AFC West goes from being a dogfight between the Raiders, Chiefs and Chargers to a cakewalk. It begins here. Chargers, 38-20.
Real final score – Chargers, 35-14. And…so it begins. The Chargers may lose next week to the Colts. After that, it’s smooth sailing to another division title.
This week 12-4 straight up (97-63 overall) and 9-6-1 against the spread (89-64-7 overall).
Tuesday, November 16th, 2010
Maybe this is why they don’t let those giant CHEZ balloons bounce around in the crowd at Scotiabank during concerts. Kids could accidentally be kicked off the stage! (The kid was OK – rumour is that it was James Hetfield’s son.) Go to the 15 second mark to see the kid fly.
Here it is from another angle…
The kid was just fine. So it’s OK to laugh.
Thursday, November 11th, 2010
One of my new favourite websites. The irony here might be that the unintentional silliness of nerds is presented, for our consumption, in the form of a web-comic. Which is, of course, nerdy in itself. Either way, this made me laugh out loud this morning.
Thursday, November 11th, 2010
Getting better in recent weeks – I now stand alone at the top of the CHEZ announcer standings with a record of 79-51 straight up and 73-51-6 against the spread. Here goes again…
Baltimore at Atlanta (1) Thursday night – Anything can happen on a Thursday, and my pick here is really a reflection of my belief in the dominance of the AFC over the NFC. Ravens, 30-20.
Real final score - Falcons, 26-21. A poor way to start the week, I would say. The Ravens have proven, time and again this season, that they can come from behind like no other team, but that they can’t hold a lead to save their lives. Both happened in this game. Flacco needs to score with five seconds remaining in every game, or the Ravens will just not win any more!
Cincinnati at Indianapolis (7) – The Bengals made it close against the Steelers at the last second, but special teams is their achilles heel. T.O. is playing out of this world the last few weeks, Cincy will keep it close. Colts, 24-21.
Real final score – Colts, 23-17. Ochocinco stepped up instead of T.O., but otherwise this game went as expected. Colts defense can score too!
Houston at Jacksonville (1.5) – Houston keeps losing to good teams, they had better beat up on the weaker ones while they can. Texans, 23-20.
Real final score – Jaguars, 31-24. Seriously? Houston? Your defense is SO bad that you can’t even bat down a hail mary pass properly?
Tennessee (1.5) at Miami – A lot of this game comes down to Randy Moss. If he has had time to gel with the offense, then the Titans win big. If not, the Dolphins pull the (minor) upset. I’m going with the latter. Dolphins, 27-24.
Real final score – Dolphins, 29-17. Moss was nowhere. Dolphins win. This team is in the mix.
Minnesota (1) at Chicago – What better chance to get the defense rolling than against the worst offensive line in football? Whether the players hate Childress or not (and I believe they do), they can be motivated to win despite him. And they will. Vikings, 27-21.
Real final score – Bears, 27-13. So the Williams, and Jared Allen, and the rest of that supposedly talented defense let Jay Cutler do that to them? Minnesota’s problems go beyond Favre’s picks.
Detroit at Buffalo (3) – The Bills have been oh so close, oh so many times. But here’s how I see this one – the Lions beat the Bears in week one. (Basically, they did.) The Bears are worse now than they were then. The Lions are better now than they were then. The Bills lost to the Bears as they are NOW. Lions, 21-20.
Real final score – Bills, 14-12. Would Matt Stafford have lofted a ball a mile out of the end zone on a two-point conversion attempt with the game on the line? Nope.
New York Jets (3) at Cleveland – Colt McCoy is amazing. He’s knocked off the Saints and the Patriots, both convincingly. Can he do that three games in a row? I think the past two weeks have given the Jets enough tape to look at to come up with a game plan against a team that, aside from three or four players, is still weak. Jets, 18-17.
Real final score – Jets, 26-20. The Jets won bigger than I thought. OT or not. But the Browns proved something – they are a damn good team, and in a couple of years could be a great one.
Carolina at Tampa Bay (6.5) – This would be the lock of the week, if it weren’t a division game. Carolina could still surprise, but Tampa isn’t taking them lightly. Buccaneers, 33-28.
Real final score – Bucs, 31-16. I keep thinking Carolina will surprise me some week. Andby that I mean, come within 2 TDs of a win. So far… nope.
Kansas City (1) at Denver – Again, a division game that could go either way. But the spread is a gift – the Chiefs are still very good, the Broncos might currently be the worst team in football. Chiefs, 28-18.
Real final score – Broncos, 49-29. Or…not.
St. Louis at San Francisco (6) – WTF on this spread. Are you kidding me? Division game be damned, the Rams are simply far better than the Niners this season. Yeah, San Fran is 2-2 at home. And the Rams are 0-3 on the road. But that won’t matter here. Rams, 24-20.
Real final score – Niners, 23-20. Well. Still, a good WTF on the spread.
Seattle at Arizona (3) – Home field advantage actually means something here, as the Seahawks are so different at home and on the road. Cardinals, 29-27.
Real final score – Seahawks, 36-18. And…Seattle takes the lead in the division. A team with two road wins can take this awful, awful division.
Dallas at New York Giants (14) – At some point, the Cowboys have to find a little inspiration and have a real game against a real team…right? Not this game, not this team. Giants, 27-10.
Real final score – Cowboys, 33-20. OK fine. It was this game, and this team.
New England at Pittsburgh (4.5) – Both teams have recently suffered a loss that makes them look less than invincible. I think, however, that New England remains more invincible than the Steelers. Patriots, 23-17.
Real final score – Patriots, 39-26. I finally got one back! Stupid football.
Phildelphia (3) at Washington – I picked the Skins AT Philly earlier in the season, because I thought McNabb’s homecoming would give them a lift. I was right, and Washington won that game. I said then that had the game been in Washington, I would have picked the Eagles. And so I will. Eagles, 24-17.
Real final score – Eagles, 59-28. Anyone pick 87 as the total score in the Monday nighter? Anyone? Michael Vick played the best game I have ever seen a quarterback play. The BEST.
This week I am a painful 6-8 straight up (85-59 overall) and a slightly less painful 7-7 against the spread (80-58-6 overall).