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Year: 2001, 2002
Genre: Sci-Fi, TV series
Starring: Robert Leeshock, Von Flores, Anita La Selva, Jane Heitmeyer, Kevin Kilner, Melinda Deines, Guylaine St-Onge, Alan Van Sprang, Helen Taylor
Eye candy: Heitmeyer, St-Onge, Deines, Taylor, La Selva
Creator: Gene Roddenberry
Run time: 15 hours, 46 minutes
DVD distributor: Alliance Films
Season Five of Earth: Final Conflict is the best one yet. Which means that it’s passable. The Taelon aliens are basically gone after Season Four, so they have to be replaced by aliens called Atavus. The Atavus are bent on destroying all of humanity, so the “conflict” part of the show is pretty cut and dried.
The Atavus, you see, are animalistic aliens. You can tell because they punctuate every sentence with guttural sounds and growls. That’s also how you can tell they’re evil. They apparently want to have sex with everyone, all the time, and they demonstrate this by licking their lips and looking women up and down a lot. At least they don’t talk like the Taelons, with that faux-soothing obnoxious voice.
As well as replacing aliens, the show also replaced its male lead, again, in the fifth season. This time, it’s Dean McDermott, in his pre-Tori Spelling days. Really, they keep replacing these actors because Jane Heitmeyer gets tired of making out with just one guy. It’s in her contract. But at the end of the season it looks like they’re going back to the guy who was the star of season four. It doesn’t really matter either way. This show is still not very good. But it appears to be getting better. Oh. Never mind. It’s over.