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Dinosaur Trainq

Year2010
GenreKids, TV series, Cartoon
CountryUnited States
LanguageEnglish
StarringPhillip Corlett, Claire Corlett, Erika-Shaye Gair, Ian James Corlett
Run time122 minutes
DVD distributorParamount Home Entertainment

     Dinosaur Train is a PBS series.  One that advertises, between every episode, Chuck-E-Cheese, and then begs for money.  Donations from viewers like me make Dinosaur Train possible!  Which makes me want to punch viewers like me.  Well, not exactly like me.  Viewers like me don’t donate money to Dinosaur Train.  Because we have more sense than that.  When I was a kid I used to read every book on dinosaurs that existed, in the library, bookstores, museums, and so forth.  I was a dinosaur nut.  And I think I would have spent maybe ten minutes watching this show, tops, before I opened another book.

     Every episode on Dinosaurs Under The Sea, on DVD August 24th from Paramount Home Entertainment, is the same.  The dinosaurs gather (a pteranodon family with an adopted T-Rex) at the train station.  The conductor shows up and drives them off somewhere.  There they observe another dinosaur from behind the protection of their safety glass.  (This train travels through the ocean.  And, judging by the references to “Triassic”, “Jurassic” and “Cretaceous”, through time as well.)  They meet the dinosaur on the other side of the glass.  That dinosaur explains a little bit about himself.  Or herself.  Like, “I breathe air just like you, but I live in the water!”  Fascinating, dinosaur.

     Then the kids play a game with the dinosaur.  And they become friends.  And then they go home.  And the next episode is the same.  As is the one after that.  And the one after that.  And I become bored and irritated.  And I turn this DVD off.  It’s back to Word Girl for me, but despite the relative quality of that show I won’t be donating any money to PBS.  It’s Dinosaur Train‘s fault.

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