Scary Movie (****4/10)
Year: 2000
Genre: Horror, Comedy
Country: United States
Language: English
Starring: Anna Faris, Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans, Cheri O’Teri, Shannon Elizabeth, Regina Hall, Carmen Electra
Eye candy: Faris, Elizabeth, Hall, Electra
Director: Keenan Ivory Wayans
Run time: 88 minutes
DVD distributor: Alliance Films
There’s nothing scary and very little funny about the first film in the Scary Movie series. That being said, it stands the test of time far better than some more recent spoof movies, such as Meet The Spartans or Epic Movie, which are some of the worst films ever to reach a movie screen. Faint praise, I know. But there are enough decent moments in Scary Movie to make it worth checking out. Like that final car scene.
I think the biggest problem I have with Scary Movie, however, is that after spoofing Friday the 13th, Hallowe’en, Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Nightmare on Elm Street and so forth, it seems to run out of films at the end. All of a sudden there’s a scene where they spoof The Matrix? Really? If you ran out of horror films so fast, how could you make three more sequels so quickly?
Scary Movie 2 (**2/10)
Year: 2001
Genre: Horror, Comedy
Country: United States
Language: English
Starring: Anna Faris, Natasha Lyonne, Regina Hall, Shawn Wayans, Marlon Wayans, David Cross, Chris Masterson, Andy Richter, James Woods, Tim Curry
Eye candy: Faris, Lyonne, Hall
Cameos: Tori Spelling, Chris Elliott
Director: Keenan Ivory Wayans
Run time: 82 minutes
DVD distributor: Alliance Films
This time it’s haunted-house movies getting the Scary Movie watered-down spoof treatment. The Exorcist, Scream (again), The Haunting, Poltergeist, Silence Of the Lambs and for some reason Mission:Impossible get spoofed here. It’s the worst of the bunch, the one that thinks simply referencing other movies is funny enough, and that actual jokes are not needed at all. Here’s the thing - they are.
Scary Movie 3 (****4/10)
Year: 2003
Genre: Horror, Comedy
Country: United States
Language: English
Starring: Anna Faris, Anthony Anderson, Leslie Nielsen, Camryn Manheim, Simon Rex, George Carlin, Queen Latifah, Eddie Griffin, Denise Richards, Regina Hall, Charlie Sheen, Pamela Anderson, Jenny McCarthy, Jeremy Piven
Eye candy: Faris, Richards, Hall, Anderson, McCarthy
Cameos: Ja Rule, Raekwon, RZA, Fat Joe, Simon Cowell, D. L. Hughley, Macy Gray, Redman, U-God, Peter Boyle, Master P, William Forsythe, Method Man, Darrell Hammond
Director: David Zucker
Run time: 88 minutes
DVD distributor: Alliance Films
Scary Movie 3 is better than Scary Movie 2 – again, faint praise, I know. The Wayans Brothers and their particularly scattershot brand of lampoon are gone, replaced by David Zucker (Airplane!). He brings Leslie Nielsen along, which is a nice addition and change of pace in the series, and lampoons The Ring and Signs and so forth. But again, he can’t help but spoof non-horror movies again (8 Mile, Independance Day, The Matrix again), and that brings the whole thing to yet another crashing halt.
Scary Movie 4 (*****5/10)
Year: 2006
Genre: Horror, Comedy
Country: United States
Language: English
Starring: Anna Faris, Regina Hall, Anthony Anderson, Bill Pullman, Molly Shannon, Michael Madsen, Craig Bierko, Leslie Nielsen, Chris Elliott, Phil McGraw, Shaquille O’Neal, Cloris Leachman, Conchita Campbell
Eye candy: Faris, Hall, Carmen Electra, Kendra Wilkinson, Holly Madison, Bridget Marquardt, Crystal Lowe, Christie Laing, Angelique Naude, Amber Borycki
Cameos: Youngbloodz, Chingy, Lil’ Jon, Fabolous, Charlie Sheen, James Earl Jones, Andre Benjamin
Director: David Zucker
Run time: 83 minutes
DVD distributor: Alliance Films
The best of the four movies, by default I guess. There is still the tendancy to merely reference other movies, and not actually mock them or spoof them. And that still really sucks. This one takes on horror movies nobody has seen (which really sucks) and also non-horror movies (which also sucks). The Village – really? How many people will get that? That movie was awful, and no one went. Then there’s Saw, The Grudge, War of the Worlds (so far so good…) and once again, inexplicably, Million Dollar Baby and Brokeback Mountain.
The reason I say the fourth is the best, and it isn’t entirely by default, is that it simply has the most bonkers cast of any of the films. Dr. Phil stars with Shaquille O’Neal and Carmen Electra? That’s something you’ll likely never see again. Which is more than I can say for the other three films. I do still love you though, Anna Faris.